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“Do that again and I’ll kick you out!”… “Mate its full time, we’re leaving anyway”
There is a meme going around social media at present “I met my younger self for a coffee today” where people egregiously list all of their achievements under the guise that they are handing out mental health advice. It’s as stomach churning as it sounds. Nevertheless, it made me realise that had my younger self […]
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“Guyer asked for a large sambucca and they gave him half a pint in two glasses”
I would usually start one of these with an attempt at humour, but I’ll start on a more solemn note this week after hearing the sad news of the passing of Laurence Good. Laurence wasn’t someone I knew personally, but he was a regular face at Dorch games both home and away over the years, […]
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“I want to see a copy of your ground regulations.”
After watching last week’s dire draw with Wimborne, I had nightmares for the next few nights that our season would now fall apart and we would return to the dross of the last decade. However, this team is different, and I convinced myself I was dreaming total bollocks. Come Thursday the excitement for Taunton on […]
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“I’m never buying a vegan sausage roll ever again.”
Those who know me will be well aware of the fact I’m not really known for my rational choices and decisions. I chose to pursue a career in the prison service and in four years as a screw at Pentonville I managed to find myself in situations where I’d get hit in the face with […]
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“When you have to call the fire brigade because your mate is locked in the Costa toilets.”
After the relegation of Hayes & Yeading last season, I had hoped we’d seen the last of clubs comprised of two shit places no one liked who merged to form one horrendous super club, but no. Havant & Waterlooville fell through the Conference South trapdoor and H&Y had been replaced in a like-for-like manner. I […]
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“How is he giving us the wanker sign at his age.. with his arthritis!?”
In the euphoric ending to 2024 and our last grasp victory over Basingstoke, Tommy Killick warned against complacency and the need to refocus quickly for Winchester just two days later. At the time, I assumed he was referring to the difficulty players can sometimes face in motivating themselves following such an emotional victory. But in […]
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“Sit down you fucking gnome.”
Before Saturday’s game, there was no plan whatsoever to do a blog on the afternoon’s festivities against Basingstoke. At about a quarter to five with us 2-1 down, I was already preparing to erase any trace of the game from my memory. However, come six o’clock, it felt like there had to be some sort […]
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“Everyone remembers that Boxing Day because of the Tsunami. I remember it because of a Groover hat trick and a 4-1 win over them lot.”
Being dragged to the footie by the old man has been a Boxing Day tradition for me from a very young age, mostly to see us get a hammering by Weymouth. Our last proper derby game with a Boxing Day victory came in 2004 when Groover scored a hat-trick in a 4-1 victory over Weymouth, […]
