“Does he just want to be suspended over Christmas? A Gary Bowles special?”

My first time writing anything other than an email or text since the days of the old fans’ online forum on a Monday morning – Kempy out! Sorry, old habits.

Anyway, onto the day. As usual, any Saturday starts with a gym session at Reluco, and a shout out to former Dorchester keeper and owner Regan Coward! My partner for the session was 1979/1980 title winning squad member Bob Brittain: an omen for the day? This was followed by a 5k park run up at the great Poundbury fields. With me carrying a few knocks this was just a matter of getting round not aggravating anything, so it gave me time to think about current topics of the world. The choices were assisted dying being passed, or net migration being higher than 2023, and where do I stand? Or Wimborne v Dorchester Town in the Southern League – the 7th tier of English football.

Who am I kidding? This is a guy who, in his English GCSE, was thinking about how to get Sunderland promoted on Championship Manager to go along with the other two promotions that month – our promotion after winning the Eastern Division and AFCB’s promotion to Division 2 (League One). I started to think of the first competitive meeting between the clubs that I could recall – a 4-1 home defeat in the 2009 DSC, when they were two levels below. I can only go to 2000, though, so a short period compared to many. The next meeting was a FA trophy defeat in 2013 – our first year in the Southern League after relegation – which we lost 2-0. Thinking that was a low point, little did we know it really wasn’t. We’ve played them more often in recent times both in the league, and a few FA cup ties thrown in.

Wimborne are very much a club on the up. Current managerial duo Tim Sills and Chris Senior (son of Trevor) have been making good progress and doing a great job; firstly at Hamworthy and more recently having taken over Wimborne, who were struggling in the league below, taking them to the play offs and last year winning the title. They have 4 ex-Dorch players I could recall, all of whom did well for us in different periods: Sam Jackson, Matty Neale, Drew Eccott -Young and Will Fletcher (please come back). Was today going to be the day we finally win 3-0 and Wardy’s bet comes in? As Ollie put in the WhatsApp group, I think we all feel vested in it. Mystic Floyd has said it’s Tiverton on the 21st so I’ve bet the mortgage: who am I to argue he’s played Conference South football?

The bus left at 1pm. An easy enough trip – topics discussed included VAR and how it ruins moments in football, Weymouth and the managerial situation, and them being sentimentally driven in their recruitment since Mark Molesley returned, plus Ant raving wax lyrical over Will Fletcher. More of him to come!

On to the match. We were slow out the blocks in the first half and lacked real tempo. Wimborne scored from a Matty Neale corner. Fletch seemed to be free in the box and from my vantage point it looked like Gez got caught under it. Before we could regroup Wimborne had a penalty. Fletch stepped up and hit it to his left, but Gez got a good hand and pushed it wide. As the half progressed, we were getting a little bit of joy down our left with some nice link up play between Pardoe and Daws. We seemed to have a number of corners – all on the Wimborne keeper who was a tad short. If I ever wanted to be a keeper, perhaps I just lacked ability rather than height and ability! Fin Crane had a chant about us both: what it was escapes me as I write this.

In the second half we came out with Wes Fogden coming on for Matt Buse who – in the first half – had a nasty collision with Will Fletcher. Either that or Tommy read my text to Rory and Pete at half-time (who were keeping me updated with the AFCB score) which said how this game was calling out for Wes Fogden.

We started the half a lot brighter, and finally forced the keeper into a smart save early in the half. Just as we were getting on top, a long ball down the middle looked to me as Bragg misjudged it and was then deemed to have been the last man bringing Fletcher down. Our 5th red of the season. This seemed to galvanise us and we got the leveller through Wes Fogden – and cue being drenched from Livvy’s beer. You wouldn’t guess I’m not drinking until Boxing Day from the stench of my jacket but who cares – 1-1. The dry-cleaning bill is in the post, mate!

This spurred Wimborne on and our goal led a charmed life for a while, with Gez more than making up for the 1st goal. But, disaster struck 5 minutes from time. Spetch seemed to get turned and, having already been booked, picked up a second yellow – and he was off: our 6th red card of the season. I think he was a tad unfortunate as I thought his first yellow was a proper good old challenge – one I like to see, but I stand to be corrected. We held firm though and got out with a 1-1 draw.

The bus home was a frustrated one, and talk of Wimborne being the worst side we’ve played – though I totally disagreed. I thought they played the game well, took very little chances, and got the ball forward early – with Fletch being a threat and Burrows running at our defence. They were far better than some teams and will be mid-table in the final reckoning. I’m sure that would warrant a good season after promotion. As we arrived back at the Avenue I wished all a goodnight and ventured home as many headed to the Junction for the West Ham v. Arsenal game.

I’ve read various bits on social media recently and heard bits in games about our form not being good enough: a few boos at half-time and Ngalo storming off down the tunnel at the end being unacceptable, and our discipline being a disgrace. I’ve booed countless teams off so have little issue with booing when a side isn’t giving it everything. Ngalo’s actions aren’t a good look, but perhaps he’s frustrated with not winning and annoyed at not having the influence on games he’s capable of – on form I don’t think there are many better players in the league. Discipline is a slight issue – I think it’s 6 red cards.

However, these are my thoughts on the current squad and form, so apologies for going full Kevin Keegan. It’s the first time ever I will spare Graham Kemp, Cal Brooks and Laird – maybe I’m mellowing as I get older. We have a squad all fighting for this club: they are not all currently at the top of their game form-wise. I can live with that – it’s just unfortunate that it seems all at once. They are all giving 100%: we’ve drawn our last five league games, but in them all we have come from behind. That’s a sign that a team won’t roll over.

After years of utter dross travelling the country (well, the south) – knowing that once we went behind that was it – I can live with this. And we know that when we hit form, we can beat anyone in this league – as we’ve shown. We currently have a great connection with the squad and coaching staff, so let’s stick with them and get back to form together so Livvy can soak me in champagne after our play-off final victory.

Up the fucking Magpies. SH.

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